Gone upstairs

a personal journey through grief and change

Back to the Future


If I am ever going to start writing again it has to be TODAY: October 21st 2015 has just enough ingredients to make it an auspicious day!

I am not a Buddhist – though I definitely have a great deal to learn about the practise of mindfulness – but I do admit I have spent a number of years searching for patterns and signs in dates and numbers, as anyone who flirted with my original blog will know.  To quote from one post from 5 years ago: “Numbers are part of the language of God.  Mathematics underpins creation: it is “the handwriting on the human consciousness of the very Spirit of Life itself” (Claude Bragdon) and the basis of science.  Generations have found numerology intriguing and there are many examples in Scripture of the prophetic mystery of numbers…” I don’t want to go back over all that ground: the blog is still there containing my many personal posts measuring out an impossible journey in the only way I knew how. The grace of God carried us through in strange and unusual ways. Surely finding meaning and purpose in our lives are what keep us all going?

So  – not a Buddhist then, but certainly a Christian. I don’t really like to use that description these days as there are some people around calling themselves Christians that I am not really sure Christ would recognise. I do not want to be identified as a right-wing fundamentalist and judgmental hypocrite… Just call me a Jesus-follower wondering what a ‘little Christ’ looks like in 21st century Britain.

This re-examining-of-everything-I-believe-in-order-to-find-out-what-I am-living-for-now is what this blog is about, I guess. My old life has died – true story: hang around and I’ll explain…  I really am trying to shake off the old ways of seeing because I know I am being called to live one day at a time without needing to be involved in some big picture/wider context that gives forward direction and helps me feel in control. It is about mindfulness and living life to the full in the NOW moment – about leaning back into Mystery and trusting there is a purpose I cannot yet see. But hey, I’ve got to start somewhere, so I start where I am – as so often in the past, provoked to write by the date! 21

To me 21 denotes a breakthrough and the number of maturity when young people historically got ‘the key of the door’… Daniel in the Old Testament fasted for 3 weeks – 3×7=21 – and an angel appeared to him at the end of that time: now that’s what I call a breakthrough!  A spiritual vision would be nice, maybe, but to have a good day with no backache, no pressures, free time, feeling happy, housework done and actually feeling like blogging will do me for a breakthrough!

AND if that wasn’t enough it is also BACK TO THE FUTURE DAY! 😉 This is the actual date Doc Brown took Marty McFly forward in time to from 1985 in that great 2nd film of the trilogy… but without the flying cars and hover-boards…  So as it says in this picture:

Back to the Future

Yes, Marty, that’s HEAVY! Ha ha – but it does make you realise time is actually passing and 30 years have been and gone. Not even a make-believe time machine can change anything that’s past – but we can all make the most of the future because ‘it hasn’t been written yet”. Again I find myself quoting the iconic film without realising it!

BTF quote

Writing the future? On that subject, here’s another long-loved quote I found while looking through those old posts on my first blog – a timely injunction to make the most of the time and gifts I have been given for the good of myself and others:

“One of the most satisfying aspects of writing is that it can open in us deep wells of hidden treasures that are beautiful for us as well as others to see.  Each human being is unique and original and nobody has lived what we have lived. Furthermore, what we have lived is not just for ourselves… Writing can be a creative and invigorating way to make our lives available to ourselves and others. We have to trust that our stories deserve to be told – and that the better we tell them, the better we will want to live them.”           

Beautifully put by Henri Nouwen from his compilation Bread for the Journey.  Don’t know about you, but I’m going to need some bread for my continuing journey and maybe there is some soul-food hidden in the continuing story and the telling of it. As our son Sam used to say, “Get busy living or get busy dying…”


So thanks for the breakthrough, 21. Let’s get on with it!


Author: Sally Ann

True-story teller - words and pictures

4 thoughts on “Back to the Future

  1. Pingback: Back To The Future Day | Aspirational Adventures

  2. Love the Snoopy cartoon. And the rest of the blog too. And it’s given me ideas for my biog – because today we do start to write our future! The house is sold and the offer is accepted on the new one 🙂 X

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: Anatomy of a blog post | Gone upstairs

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